# Please rate my film.



## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 8, 2006)

I know, sorry about the double post. It was meant to go in this topic. Sorry administrator people...

I had to upload this in PIECE OF CRAP quality. It's actually filmed with a Canon GL1, so please just try to bare with the pixelated garbage. Oh, and the end is important when you see him holding the Ticket. Ask me about it later, telling it would give stuff away.

Thanks a million. By the way, this is my NYU submission. I went full on with the narrative story thing. So, few effects, all story.

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.indiv...l&videoID=1403274346

Tyler


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 8, 2006)

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.indiv...l&videoid=1406009121

there's the correct link for BETTER QUALITY verson


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## Kurt Wagner (Nov 8, 2006)

I liked it, though during the cop's speech I started thinking "where's the drama?"  

nice ending though.


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 8, 2006)

I'm not sure I know what you mean by "where's the drama."

If your asking about the somewhat empty feeling in the beginning, well, the function of a twist is to make whole that which was missing in the beginning. If you watch it a second time, knowing the end, I think it is actually more dramatic. I don't know, thank you so much for your input.

Think it'll get me into NYU?? I have a 4.8 GPA, and a 1340 old scale SAT, and some good letters of rec and a good EC list.

I'm obsessive, I know.

Tyler


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## Kurt Wagner (Nov 8, 2006)

I think it was the whole speech, especially when the cop begins to talk about the grandmother.  It just triggered a "who the heck cares" thought... it's half way into the film and no drama?  Still a cop talking?  I'm not saying this in a good or bad way... I liked the film overall.  It just seemed a little slow with the speech, until the ending of course which explains everything.  good job though.  I liked the camera shot in the end with the cop driving off... nice touch.


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 9, 2006)

Cool cool. Thanks

Any others? Please?

Tyler


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## titaniumdoughnut (Nov 9, 2006)

You have talent. It's not often that a high school film can have so many good things said about it. Well crafted in every way, nice cinematography, good sound design (I heard a tad of reverb in the dubbed lines, but honestly, it doesn't matter,) good editing. A simple, but clever and well-told story. Near the beginning of the cop's speech, I did get that "oh dear... here we go" feeling that proceeds long and random speeches in movies, but the short nature of the piece helped propel it along fast enough that I didn't lose interest. All in all, it was quite excellent. The mood was spot on.


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 9, 2006)

Awesome!

Okay people, it says it has 59 views, but only 2 comments. Please give me some feedback!

Thanks!
Tyler


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 9, 2006)

Better quality verson now online! Any and all feedback would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks!

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.indiv...l&videoid=1406009121


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 9, 2006)

Sigh...


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## Fellini77 (Nov 11, 2006)

I liked it.
You have eye for film.You can tell that by the way you place your camera, camera moves, over the shoulder shots ,the editing etc. I think tisch can see that also.
I thought the story was ok but yourÂ´re more of a director than a writer. Thats ok because we dont have many writer/director out there.
Cheers, good lucky.


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 11, 2006)

Thanks! Any more?

Tyler


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## Mark Denega (Nov 11, 2006)

Very well done. The production value was way above that of an average high school film, and that's awesome. You clearly put a lot of effort into this film. The camera movements were fantastic, as was framing. The desaturated colors gave it a very filmy feel, which I liked. The story started out kind of weak, but progressively got better, and ended very nicely. Overall terrific job. I would feel confident about Tisch.


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## Jefflev (Nov 12, 2006)

It's pretty good for a high school film- they will deffinatley see that you have potential. But on a college level, there were a lot of things wrong with it. The story line was kind of dull (i.e- no drama). I also didn't really see any conflict in your writing. My attention went elswhere during the cops korny speach- but the ending sumed it up nicely. You have to remember: the point of film making is too make people feel things they ordinarily wouldn't. And with this short, I deffinatley felt something (not sure what yet)- but it was there. Tisch? I don't know. Might not be the school for you any way. Tisch is looking for drama and concept. Your's didn't really have either. Good luck on your seach- you should do fine.


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## Evan Kubota (Nov 12, 2006)

I could only watch the first minute or so...

It's very didactic and the pacing is sluggish. The opening credits are way, way too long. Couldn't you get the same idea across in a more concise manner?


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## johnJOHNjohn (Nov 13, 2006)

Definitley very well on the technical side and extremely mature; can't say I really enjoyed the story, though, to be honest.  I know Tisch supposedly weighs the story the most but the story definitely wasn't bad and you did have a twist, which shows ability.  It is certainly above average but won't get you in alone; thus, if you have a good essay and a good resume (along with the academics), you should have a pretty good chance of getting in (especially if you applied ED).


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 13, 2006)

I really wanted to apply ED, but for some stupid reason my college advisor thought ED wasn't a good decision and limited me on scholarships if I got in RD, but whatever. I did RD.

I don't know guys, I definetely see where you all are coming from, and I thank you all so much for the input, but to my story's defense, let me just say what I intended to do in the film.

Well, obviously there is no story until you realize the end. Once you figure out what's been going on, I think it's full of story. It's a story about a father and a son, a snapshot of a teenagers adolescence and his relationship with his father. Of course, you don't know that until the end. 

In addition, the pace and slowness of it was intentional. I tried to incorporate my Southern background into the piece. The setting, the slowness of the country, the way the cop talked. I know its slow, and it was very different from things I've done in the past, but not all movies have people running to rock music... 

I also am confused on how some people say its a melodrama and others say it has zero drama. Huge difference, just wondering...

Anyway, I do strongly appreciate all the comments. Anymore would be greatly, greatly appreciated.

Tyler


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## funkbomb (Nov 13, 2006)

> In addition, the pace and slowness of it was intentional. I tried to incorporate my Southern background into the piece. The setting, the slowness of the country, the way the cop talked. I know its slow, and it was very different from things I've done in the past, but not all movies have people running to rock music...


As a tip for future reference, it's often better to show characters or visual cues that the pace of the atmosphere is slow, rather then pacing the editing of the movie itself as slow. For instance, the classic way to show a laid back, country setting would be an old man in a rocking chair literally "spittin' and chewin'". Or a water spicket with only a few drops of water slowly coming out of it. You want to portray the image of a slow pace, but you don't want to bore your audience either.


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## Evan Kubota (Nov 13, 2006)

> not all movies have people running to rock music...



Hm, trust me, I don't care for that sort of thing at all. But just because you may use longer takes doesn't mean they should be regular scenes, only with more time spent on each angle - that's boring. If you have a longer take there needs to be a clear reason, preferably visual. Something to hold the viewer's interest in the frame.


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## KtoI (Nov 13, 2006)

Actually, if it was a snapshot you didn't get that message to me either...I thought the dad was dead and the kid was associating the lecturing cop with his dad.

About the southern thing...I'm sitting right here in the most southern state of the continental US (not in the most "southern" part,though)...it was just very slow,actually a little laborious for a short movie.It was painful.I'm sorry but I watched the whole thing and it was.

Perhaps, you should send in one of your other pieces, if they're faster


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 8, 2006)

I know, sorry about the double post. It was meant to go in this topic. Sorry administrator people...

I had to upload this in PIECE OF CRAP quality. It's actually filmed with a Canon GL1, so please just try to bare with the pixelated garbage. Oh, and the end is important when you see him holding the Ticket. Ask me about it later, telling it would give stuff away.

Thanks a million. By the way, this is my NYU submission. I went full on with the narrative story thing. So, few effects, all story.

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.indiv...l&videoID=1403274346

Tyler


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 13, 2006)

So if I had used the same script and same everything, just added more shots to make each one shorter, it would have been better?

Which shots are too long? I could perhaps see the "The way a man drives, it speaks about the man" shot. And a few others.

It just, like, okay I thought about it a few times. Like when the cop first changes position and moves from the front of the car to a right angle, facing the kid, and begins his long schpeel, I filmed it with a few different angles. I obviously chose to keep it one continuous shot. I just felt having a tighter shot, or mixing it up too much would take away from the continuity or make it overly dramatic when it was intended to be simple.



> Tisch is looking for drama and concept. Yours didn't really have either.


I don't see how this is true. I love criticism, just explain yourself at such a huge comment. No concept? Father and son relationship and the father's message? Drama, watch is a second time knowing there is a father-son relationship. Maybe it's true, I just don't understand what you mean.

Anyway, more full reviews would be appreciated. I continue to thank all those helping me refine my filmmaking skills so my next project can be as best as it can.

Thanks!

Tyler


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 13, 2006)

> Actually, if it was a snapshot you didn't get that message to me either...I thought the dad was dead and the kid was associating the lecturing cop with his dad.



Say what? Lol.

Tyler


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 13, 2006)

My counselor basically said that should I apply ED and get in, I couldn't continue my apps with other schools. If I got in other schools with scholarships, because my grades are very good, I could use that to try to get NYU to give me more money. That was her reasoning. My reasoning was do whatever the hell I can to get in, then worry about the money. In the end, it was a decision between me and my parents. My parents wanted to do what the advisor said. Oh well.

Anyway, do you know the definition of diatribe? The father does not make an attack or criticsm on anything... Look pal, not liking my story is one thing, but understanding why you don't is another. The point of the whole story is not to educate anyone about the meaning of life. Rather, my story tried to show something. It tried to show how a Southern father, who happens to be a cop, communicates with his son. That's the point, and if he wasn't the father, there would be no point.

Thanks though.

Tyler


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 13, 2006)

By the way, if you can read it, the ticket at the very end, after it flashes back to the "Ticket" scene, simply says "I love you." Maybe this helps reinforce the fact that I'm not trying to come across as preaching life's point, but just trying to represent a real life relationship and culture.

Tyler


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## dhdrixle (Nov 14, 2006)

I liked it, I thought it was interesting, and I liked your point of view. I understand where you are right now because I applied to Tisch, though under Early Decision, but I guess I didn't want to put up my work on here because I didn't want to get discouraged. 

Now for a little criticism, with knowledge that you are making this for an admissions board, it would have been smarter to make the movie faster, because 1. they are not going to rewatch the movie 2. I doubt they are going to care much about the end when they just drudged through 5 minutes of slowness. Other than that, I really did like the angles that you used and it was very well done. We took very different approaches and I know mine is definately not flawless, but you have to realize that you are going to be scruitinized when you put work online. Overall, it was good, but slow like others have said.

Logan


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 14, 2006)

Yea, I gotcha. Thanks man.

All I hear directly from Tisch is that they want storytelling ability. Can't a slower story still demonstrate that I can tell a story? I don't know. Maybe it's technically wrong to do what I did, but if it's just preference, I don't know...

Like, I know Tisch looks for potential. If the biggest thing wrong with my film is the pace, wouldn't they just think: "We can teach him to speed it up because a lot of other things are good with it." I don't know. 

Thanks a lot.

Tyler


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## Kurt Wagner (Nov 14, 2006)

I think I missed something.  Where were the angels?


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 14, 2006)

Though funny, I hope you know he means angles.

Tyler


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## titaniumdoughnut (Nov 14, 2006)

I would like to think the admissions board knows at the very least to take a movie as a whole. To think they'd get bored and then disregard the end is slightly frightening... but you never know... :/


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## tomorrowsNIGHT (Nov 14, 2006)

I really wanted to say that.

Thanks.

Tyler


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## Curly Shoes (Nov 25, 2006)

The look and feel are good. I like the shot  with the boy's face in the rear view mirror, it shows you think about where to put the camera. But your downfall is the story. It's not strong enough. It's nice you show the mending relationship between father and son, but it didn't show me you could write a deep, complex structured script. Not enough happens with the characters emotions. Was the father and son's relationship distant before the meeting? If so, you didn't indicate it. Is the son resenting the father? Does the father disaprove of his son's life, you just made it seem like he caught him speeding and that was all, no deeper meaning. The dialouge was very forced. All the sudden he starts talking about an elderly couple, and you start feeling as if its misplaced in the story. It doesn't really have that much effect on moving your film foward. I wish there was more dialogue between the father and son. The character of the son is to flat to understand anything he's feeling. Not enough happens. It's fairly bland. Nothing that stirs you or makes you think. The story, characters, and dialouge are just to weak. Your visuals are clean and well thought out, but that story will limit your chances. The next film you make, try to colaborate with someone who is a highly-skilled writer. Tell them the story, and let them come up with dialouge and work closely on character development, and major plot points. Your a good director, but you need to up the quality of story or your chances will shrink. Hope it helps.


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