# The Failure Project



## Kylok (Mar 26, 2009)

So.. what's it gonna be, folks?

That is, the project all of us rejects devote our collective would-be grad school time to. Both sarcastic and genuine responses welcome!


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## smell_the_glove (Mar 26, 2009)

...I got nothin'.  I'll let you know when my brain isn't fried.


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## WillieGreen (Mar 26, 2009)

We could write/film vignettes chronicling our film school failures, compile them, sweep the film festival circuit, et cetera et cetera


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## skipper (Mar 26, 2009)

I envision a montage of people working on applications...pulling their hair out, making frenzied edits, paying $60 to overnight application materials that were maybe procrastinated on just a bit too long...

It would of course all be set to The Who's  _Baba O'Riley_...probably known to most as "teenage wasteland." I'm not a teenager anymore...but it still seems like an applicable/awesome song.


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## Kylok (Mar 26, 2009)

Good musical selection! (It eliminates most of my ability to contribute, but I can't say no to The Who!)

Think about it: there must be many more failures than acceptances to most of these schools. With our powers combined, we'll overwhelm the festivals with our sheer numbers!


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## skipper (Mar 26, 2009)

> Originally posted by Kylok:
> Think about it: there must be many more failures than acceptances to most of these schools. With our powers combined, we'll overwhelm the festivals with our sheer numbers!



It's a given then that our film will include entire segments of nothing but diabolical laughter.


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## smell_the_glove (Mar 26, 2009)

Haha...that's good.  But diabolical laughter made by clowns.  And it has to be like a terrible art film in black and white with people rocking back and forth in a corner repeating the same lines over and over again..."Not in.  Not in.  Not in."  Which sounds jamaican for nothing.  Right?


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## Sojouner (Mar 26, 2009)

Days later...

...taking bong hits with friends that never left town, "Yeah man, when I'm accepted I'll let you guys visit me on campus or something. How does that sound?" Jamaican music b.g. chanting "Not in. Not in. Not in"


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## Kylok (Mar 26, 2009)

Maybe we need to think outside the box. They'll be EXPECTING us to make a film about being rejected, since that's what we all have in common. (Assuming there's some group of people predicting our actions in an attempt to thwart us, which is always an unhealthily safe assumption.)

But they WON'T be expecting a film about...

(Pin the tail on the ellipsis.)


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## skipper (Mar 27, 2009)

...the Spanish Inquisition?


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## notroberttowne (Mar 27, 2009)

nobody expects the spanish inquisition!  Our chief weapon is fear.  fear and suprise...


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## skipper (Mar 27, 2009)

And ruthless efficiency! Our  *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and a ruthless efficiency...


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## pseudobook (Mar 27, 2009)

I had a dream that the rejects (of Columbia - myself probably included) stormed campus and kidnapped some professors, demanding they teach them. It had a real Toy Soldiers kind of feel to it, with guns and ivy league school grounds, sneaking around, etc.

I will NOT be making that movie. I do like the idea of a ruthlessly efficient Spanish Inquisition, though.


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## Kylok (Mar 27, 2009)

You know the old saying: every dream you don't make a movie about is just a waste of your subconscious's time. And your subconscious has places to be, people to meet..

Skipper, notRT, I'm sensing a comedic masterpiece in its infancy here today. I just hope to God that nobody beat us to the punch.


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## Michael Tom (Mar 27, 2009)

...if every dream that I don't make a movie of is a waste of time, then I should be starting pre-production on an action-horror epic set against the backdrop of the Iraq war, starring Vivica A. Fox and Alec Baldwin as star-crossed lovers fighting zombies in the desert (seriously).

Then again, if this is the kind of stuff my subconscious gives me, maybe I don't need film school at all and I'm better off being rejected.


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## Kyle Johnson (Mar 27, 2009)

"maybe I don't need film school at all and I'm better off being rejected."

adsactly. what the hell do you have to prove?  You think you can only make a film when you've paid someone else thousands of dollars to attend their classes? Just because then someone EXPECTS you to be making projects with THEIR materials? and because they expect you to get grades. You really want someone else to tell YOU what YOU'RE doing RIGHT OR WRONG?

i dont believe in either side, there's no right or wrong, there's only that middle place where things happen that have never happened before. They sure can be negative and they sure can be positive and sometimes the negative turns into the positive ect!

I dont believe in you rejects. I dont. You've accepted that you're rejects to a system that only turns out people who produce TV commercials and bad 1 minute news reports.

If you want, you CAN make a film. It may take YEARS of your life because you wont have a huge team or access to million dollar equipment, but it will be done someday on your time rather than 4 week deadlines or preliminary edits done by people who dont understand the needs you have.

Its ridiculeous and I havnt even been there but I have friends or I have stories and I know you guys who tell me what you do in these insitituions. And Ive checkd out schools too believe me, schools that wont reject you (cause they want your money) but their programs are so NAZI. They want to turn out everyone into different fields. Its never about real Art. its abut making you money after you've invested your money, and a lot of the schools Ive checked out are not that great in their turn outs and successes.

So dont believe you're a reject. Believe you're independant. You wont be forced to do dumb projects, you're got all the time in your world to make something that means something. Get a normal job, or a good job,o r go to school to be a scientist, but in the infinite that is your spare time or liesure, believe that you do have the will and guts to do it on your own without their instruction/paperwork/method


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## Kyle Johnson (Mar 27, 2009)

& BTW the only appropriate song that should underline your existences (since I cant imagine how The Who does):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHOn093r-Ak

One more young writer slid away in the night
Over the border he will drown in light
Hold it - wait a minute
I can't read my writing, my own writing!
Like tiny insects in the palm of history
A domino effect in a cloud ofmystery
My writing is an iron fist
In a glove full of vaseline
Dip the fuse in the kerosene
I too become a dissident

Courting disaster we ran in the night
Wings of an angel torn in flight
Check it - verify it
It's all here in writing, down in writing!
At the hands of the press
And in the eyes of the government
I fell from grace
I too became a dissident
Like tiny insects in the palm of history
A domino effect and an early end to this story
My writing is an iron fist in a
glove full of vaseline
But dip the fuse in the kerosene
I too become a dissident.


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## skipper (Mar 29, 2009)

> Originally posted by Kylok:
> Skipper, notRT, I'm sensing a comedic masterpiece in its infancy here today. I just hope to God that nobody beat us to the punch.



Well, if it has been done before I think we can handle the ensuing duel for rights. I predict that they'll attack with a banana. My proposed strategy is to 1.) force them to drop the banana and 2.) eat the banana.


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## Kylok (Mar 29, 2009)

True words of wisdom, Kyle J.

Impeccable strategy, skipper. My gut is telling me to verify that the legal way to settle copyright disputes is via dueling, but my heart is telling me to trust our assumptions.

And in the constant inner struggle between your heart and your guts, your heart always comes out on top.


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## skipper (Mar 30, 2009)

> Originally posted by Kylok:
> Impeccable strategy, skipper. My gut is telling me to verify that the legal way to settle copyright disputes is via dueling, but my heart is telling me to trust our assumptions.



I'm almost positive that dueling is an acceptable way to settle copyright disputes.*

*It may be of note that I studied history, not the law.


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