# Writing your recommendation yourself?



## ragless (Nov 18, 2009)

Hello all!
I need some advice:

One of my recommenders has just asked me to write the first draft of my recommendation myself. How do I even start?

I am also worried that it will sound too much like me, especially since I wrote a personal statement.


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## Silverlenz (Nov 18, 2009)

I don't think writing your own letter or rec. is a good idea. Thats just me though. Besides it really doesn't say a lot of about the recommender if they aren't willing to write it themeselves. Just my two cents. 


SilverLenz


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## Jayimess (Nov 18, 2009)

Do not write the letter, rather give them talking points.  If that's not good enough, find another recommender.


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## stellarphase (Nov 18, 2009)

one of my professors asked me to write a draft...but mostly so she would know what I wanted her to specifically mention. So I just googled some letters and kind of based my format off that and explained to her why Im applying to my specific discipline.


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## Jayimess (Nov 18, 2009)

I wrote personal letters to my recommenders, thanking them for their recommendation and their time, and included a list of reasons why I chose them as recommenders.

i.e. 

_Dear Person Recommending Me:  

Thanks so much for helping me get into grad school!   Your mentorship has meant so much in the process of deciding to apply to film school, I don't think I would be here without you.   

I chose you to write this letter because I think you can attest to this aspect of my personality and this aspect of my potential.  Here are my goals.  

Please focus on these traits, and how they can help me reach my goals, when you write the letter, but don't feel limited to them.  

Thanks so much for your time, Me._

I also included *stamped and addressed envelopes* for each school they were writing to, along with any required forms, and made *a calendar* of when things needed to be sent.

Because you are turning in so much writing, I do think it's risky to write it yourself, not to mention unethical of your recommender to ask you to do so.  Nothing you say is going to be as true as anything they say, and the similarity of voice is a real problem.


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## femme.focale (Nov 18, 2009)

A friend of mine got a recommendation from some hot shot in Hollywood, but seeing as she's very busy, she asked that he write it himself.  Wanting the recommendation but not wanting to be unethical, he wrote a draft (or bullet points, I forget) and gave it to a friend to re-write.  The end result was a solid, honest letter that was not in his voice, signed by a very important person.  Did it suck?  Yeah, he hated every minute of it.  But it's sadly a reality sometimes.

My advice is if you plan on writing a draft, get a friend to re-write it before sending it off to your recommender.  That way, if they're lazy and change nothing, you'll be safe.  Good luck!!!


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## ragless (Nov 18, 2009)

Thanks so much for the advice, guys!
It's my own fault for leaving this last recommendation to the last minute (just under 2 weeks!), so I think I'm going to have to get a friend to draft it.

That's a great idea!


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## Mike_V (Nov 19, 2009)

Personaly I drafted the letters of recommendation myself and send it to my recommender. It makes life easier for them and it's faster. You leave out room for the person to put their own flair in, but what you want is to get the story together for them so they can read it and make it "theirs" and send it out with their blessing.


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## Bartleby Fink (Nov 19, 2009)

That's not only a horrible idea, it's completely unethical. I recommend Jayimess' approach:

"I'm pleased you're writing my letter for me as you can really speak to my outstanding achievements/amazing characteristics/wonderful blah blah blah in a specific light."


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## Silverlenz (Nov 19, 2009)

I second that. It's unethical.

SilverLenz


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## ragless (Nov 19, 2009)

well, as far as i'm concerned, writing the rec myself is equally unethical. 

it's all good, though, i'm going with another recommender who is willing to write my recommendation herself!


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## Mike_V (Jan 6, 2010)

it does sound unethical and all that jazz. but the truth is, the person who's writing your letter sometimes do not have the time to draft the whole thing and sometimes they would even refuse to write it for you if you don't do most of the legwork for them (that includes drafting it). Remember, this is talking about drafting a letter, not finalizing it. It is, in essence, a template for which they can work their recommendation wording. Alot of this, again, seems wrong, but people have different approaches.
I personally preferred the recommender to write the whole thing by themselves, but on separate occasions, I was specifically requested to draft it up for them and they will do the rest themselves. So in reality, it's not a horrible or unethical idea, it's simply a different approach.


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## Ananas (Jan 11, 2010)

For my undergraduate degree to Calarts, I wrote all of the recommendations myself. I didn't hide it either, I wrote one from my dog, my alarm clock and my dead great grandmother from beyond the grave. It's silly but it worked and I got in on the first try. (Although calarts isn't the best example. It's debatably whether they even read any of the written material.)

Unfortunately, I ran into a similar problem this year when applying for grad school. None of my undergraduate teachers were responding to my requests. I had worked hard establishing faculty contacts and I was upset none of them taking my requests seriously. I was sick thinking I would have to write all my own letters (AGAIN), even after all that effort I put into preventing this very occurrence from happening again. 

I waited for my teachers until a week before the deadline. In a last ditch attempt, I contacted some of my old bosses and asked them for letters of rec. They responded a few hours later saying they would help me but only if wrote one for them. UGH...! I didn't argue. I wrote them each  first drafts and they added their own revisions.  - That was that.


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